The Big Picture

In the grand scheme of life......what is really important?
Yes, having a roof over our heads, food on the table, having a job, paying our bills, etc.
What we are not exposed to, doesn't really fit into the picture.

Here's a picture to make us thankful of what we have, or rather what we don't have.

My sister belongs to a financial institution that lends their help and money to a charity that does wonderful, if not extraordiary, work with this organization.

This is an e-mail she sent to me:

"Just wanted to a pass along a picture of a very special little girl who attended the About Face baseball Tournament that was held on Saturday June 23rd".

"About Face” raises funds for children with facial differences. The MDM channel supports this charity with a variety of fund-raising activities throughout the year.

You can see who the real winner of the day was!

She is four years old and my sister says she is a doll! After the tournament she was running around saying, "I want to hold the trophy, I want to hold the trophy". She really wanted that trophy!!! Her parents are wonderful people, that's her dad and mom in the front row along with my sister.

I'm very proud of my sister and just wanted to share it with you all.

Hugs Galore!!!

PS. I remember when my daughter was growing up, when anything bad happened I used to thank God. Because it could have been so much worse. Sounds corny but it's true.

Good Deed Goes Awry

Princess (my daughter) is big on donating blood. As my iron is always 'iffy, I'm a bit leery. She dragged me to the blood bank last summer and everything went relatively well. My iron was good, they got my blood in record time and afterwards I got up[jumped] from the bed, very pleased with myself.

Then I went over to the table to join her for a spot of tea and well........it was all downhill from there. I started to lose my hearing and everything got very fuzzy. I managed to get to a bed before falling down, then they all came around me, putting wet cloths on my brow, feeding me orange juice, etc.
What a fuss, it was very embarrassing.

I finally got up the nerve to go again today, as they are advertising they are short of my blood type. All went well again, except this time I had tons of juice and cookies beforehand, to avoid what happened last time.

When I was finished today I told them what happened last time, so they kept me longer.

Later I was told to swing my legs over the side to get up. So far so good. Then I stood up, felt great, the nurse went away, and all of a sudden my arm started spurting blood all over the place. They had put a gauze pad over the area with a band-aid holding it in place but it did nothing to stop the situation.

It was literally gushing, all over the bed, down my arm right to my fingers. It soaked my leather watchband. The nurse rushed over, laid me down again and started wiping up the mess. She had me hold a towel to my arm to stop the flow. She then wrapped some kind of sticky tensor bandage four or five times around my arm to stop the flow.

I wonder how long I have to leave it on??
















I probably needed a transfusion myself after all that but they didn't offer. :)

BUT I did get a T-shirt out of the deal. My shirt was covered in blood and they have a policy that if you get blood on your clothes, you get a t-shirt!!! The only one they had was an X-Large and almost down to my knees. (See Below)

Beggars can't be choosers...........
This idiom means that people who are in great need must accept any help that is offered, even if it is not a complete solution to their problem.

Will I go again?? Sure, now that I know the "what not to do" stuff.

How was your day??

"R" Rated

Do you all have your parents or guardians permission slip to visit my site?
I'm gonna go with the honour system and believe that you do :)



Cabot Trail







Cape Breton


Regarding my post about 8 things about me, I decided to elaborate on # 5.
(See my last post if need be).

I grew up on an island, Cape Breton Island in cottage country. Surrounded by the Bras'dor Lakes, in a picturesque world. See the photos above if you have any doubt.

Anyhoo, I had a very good friend (from the city) that lived in my neck of the woods for the whole summer. We did everything together, swim, go to teeny bops, hitch hike up to Kelly's Mountain to go to a dance, cover for each other when we were going somewhere "not allowed".
Talk about boys we liked and wanted to date, etc. etc.

We drifted apart as we grew older.

Then I met the man of my dreams and moved to Toronto. After 6 six years of marriage(controlling), I was ready to move on, with the help of a very kind doctor. Since I was on my own, I didn't go out very much socially.(never) My brother ran into my old friend when she was on vacation in C.B. and gave her my telephone #, telling her to contact me.

She did. We drank and had fun reminiscing about our childhood memories. It got late and I called my other girlfriend who was looking after my daughter, to tell her I was staying the night. I had no pj's so I just went to bed in my bra and panties. We're all girl's right?

Well, here's where the "R" rating comes in...........

In my sleep, I though I was having an erotic dream and I woke up to find my "girlfriend" on top on me, necking with me passionately!!

For those catholics out there, you'll get a kick out of this. I jumped up and started to pace back and forth, all the while saying, jesus, jesus, jesus. I grabbed the comforter of the bed and went out to the living room and slept on the couch! When I got up the next morning, she was gone to work.

The really weird part of this story was that I pretended it never happened. We got together on other occasions after this and not a word was spoken about it. I still saw her as my close friend as a child and the memories (trouble) we got into together.
But I never got "into" bed with her again!!!!!!!! (I wasn't that naive)

PS She did some other things after that, that I could forgive but not forget. She was a troubled soul.

But that's another "R" posting. :-)

Three Parts of The Puzzle

I've been tagged by Tiger By the Tale, and have taken the liberty to change the rules. Instead of Pieces of Eight, I have changed it to Three Parts of The puzzle. Simply because the people that have blogs that I would have tagged.......have already been tagged.

The Rules: List 8 things about yourself. At the end of the post, tag and link to 8 (or in my case 3) other people. Leave a comment at those sites, letting them know they’ve been tagged, and asking them to come read the post so they know what to do.

Well.............here goes I.

1. I have a stalker who means me harm.

2. I live under an assumed name because of this.

3. I eat my food funny because I was once anorexic and bulimic.

4. I don't think that I am attractive although people tell me I am.

5. I once had my best childhood girlfriend come on to me while I was sleeping.

6. I had my daughter when I was very young. I am her best friend and she is mine.

7. I miss my mom so much it hurts.

8. I'm afraid of getting into a relationship.

Well, there it is folks!

I now tag..........

Bunny Lynn Boofay

Fly With Me

Steve's Whirlyworld

Gerry....My Friend

Gerry died this morning...........
They gave him 3 months but he lasted only 3 days.









I'm extremely saddened by this and the only glimmer of happiness that I can retrieve in my mind is that I got to talk to him on Saturday. I sincerely hope that he knew who I was when I was talking to him, I think he did.

He loved his computer and the information it allowed him to reach that we normally wouldn't be able to. He loved reading all the newspapers worldwide and then informing us of what was going on in the world. Some, more often than not, were stories that we would not particularly want to hear. He had a very witty and articulate way of posting them on our neighbourhood community site.

I will miss him dearly and the fact that we still have his stories to read, will help with the pain.
Also, speaking about computers, now I realize how nice it is to have friends online because when I read their posts, it takes my mind away from my troubles.

Thank You Blog Friends,

Love Maggie XXOO

How Does Your Blog Rate????

http://mingle2.com/blog-rating

This here is borrowed from Tiger By the Tale.

I seem to borrow a lot of things from you TigerYogi. I hope you don't mind TY.

They say, Imitation......is the sincerest form of flattery! (xxoo)

Seems I'm A VERY, VERY, bad girl!!!!

These are the no no's that gave me an R rating..........Ifin' I'm a lyin', I'm a dyin'!!
hell (4x)
anal (3x)
pain (2x)
sex (1x)

It's interesting how they choose to pick up on certain words on your blog and use them to judge you.

According to them, I'm writing that anal sex causes pain and anyone who engages in it will be going to hell. Or another scenario, having anal sex will send you to hell where you will experience a lot of pain. Either one is absurd.

Also, since when is hell a "bad word"? I personally think this is a conspiracy spearheaded by The Roman Catholic Church!!!! But being the good little Catholic girl that I am, I am saying ten Hail Mary's, ten Our Father's, and 5 Acts of Contrition!!

Just in case, you know you can never be too careful. :0)

Friends.......

I'm really sad and melancholy today. I just found out that a friend is dying.

My girlfriend in Toronto told me Gerry has Head and Neck Cancer: Squamous Cell Carcinoma ...

They give him 3 months but he is only around 70 lbs now so it won't be that long.

I called Mt. Sinai (the hospital he's in) this morning. It didn't even sound like him and I hope that he knew who he was talking too. All I could do was give him my love and tell him I was thinking of him every day. It's times like this when I wish I was back in Toronto to spend time and help comfort him. But I'm not.......

There used to be a local bar/pub that all the locals went to after work or on the weekends. There was a very eclectic group of people but we all got along. There were professionals, labourers, writers, actors, rednecks, but everyone respected each other for who they were, not what they did.

Gerry always had a book in his hand, sitting on a barstool, reading and enjoying his drink and cigarette. Don't get me wrong, he'd always get involved in a conversation that he found interesting.

No one really knew too much of his past except that he had lived in Japan for quite a number of years. He also has an ex-wife (Japanese) and a son. He is also brilliant, actually genius would be more accurate. We also got the impression that he came from a very wealthy family. Not that he said anything, but he had that air and monies would come from mummy when he needed it.
He worked as a courier and that didn't pay much, but he liked the freedom it gave him.

He used to try and engage me to join him in cryptograms that he enjoyed (extremely difficult). For some reason he thought I was smart also!!! I tried and did manage to keep up with him.(Barely) :-)

We also have a neighbourhood blog of sorts, called a Community Form, that he is the manager of. It was great for me because I could still stay in touch with everyone from the 'hood, even though I had moved away. He pissed people off because he was always posting intellectual stuff that no one could understand. I always enjoyed his posts though because they were always relevant to what was going on in todays society.

He has a girlfriend that is a dimwit. (once again I'm guessing, no pressure). She says she has her degree in English Lit, but she sure doesn't act it. I'm so worried about him because she does not have a clue on how to help him. He wants to come home to die and she is incapable of handling the situation. Like getting a nurse or caregiver to come in and look after him, monitoring his medications, getting support from the health system, etc. Looking into all these important things are beyond her. It's not that she is overcome with grief, she is just hopeless. I am hoping that the rest of his friends will step in and help.

He wants to go home........he misses his computer.
Is that too much to ask for?

TWISTED ??

I'm way out of element on this topic so feel free to jump in and give me your opinion....

I'll set the stage by describing the people involved........

I have this adorable young couple as patients. He is twenty, she is nineteen. The young man lost his dad when he was very young, he was killed by a bullet. He looks like a punk rocker but he's not, he has a tattoo of a teardrop below his left eye in memory of his dad. He's drop dead gorgeous.
The young girl was given to foster care by her mother when she was twelve. She is a knockout!
She works, he works, they are both a credit to anyone who has grown up in the "system".
She just got a job in a well known restaurant as a line cook and they want to send her away to the best culinary school in the maritimes. At their expense!!

Well, their history has nothing to do with my story but I love these kids so much, I just wanted to brag about them.

The girl G, came in as last appointment of today with an abscessed tooth. She saw my boss as I was busy, but that didn't mean I didn't come into her operatory to give her a hug. I asked about M (the boyfriend) and she had quite the story to tell me!!

Seems he has not been well due to a testicle problem. Something about a varicose vein leading to one of his testes was causing pain and low sperm count. (They plan on having kids down the road). She continued on to describe his surgery and my boss who doesn't say much, looked to be cringing a bit during our conversation.

I had to get back to my patient, but was very curious about all this. G had mentioned that the blood would go into the penis but was not leaving properly. Sure enough, I finished with my patient before G left and had ample opportunity to find out more about this situation. :)

It turned into a comical conversation (due to me, I must admit). I was wondering, because if the blood was going down but not up, if he always had an erection. No was the answer, apparently it was the opposite, he had a "hard" time keeping one. Then G started telling us about when he went to emergency and the female doctor was holding his testicles to spot the problem. I don't think it's twisted testicles because.................., she told him. We just went on from there.........

Another part of this story was.......... my boss walked by us "gals" yakkin' about all this and his face was beet red. (He's shy, that kind of stuff embarrasses him). He's still cool though, I love him!

Girls will be girls, anything that involves penises and pain, we're all ears, and questions!!!!!
(Remember, we go thru childbirth).

M is fine now but still asks his girlfriend if she can spot the difference between the size of his testes.

I looked it up and this seems to have been the problem. Varicocele

I apologize to all you males out there and can only say in my defense.........
I'm in a silly mood and this is what happened!!!!

[Silly Girl].

The Mechanical Contrivium

Borrowed from Tiger By the Tale

1. The book of Esther in the Bible is the only book which does not mention maggie.
She always was the jealous type!

2. Only one child in twenty will be born on the day predicted by maggie.
Those odds aren't THAT bad!!

3. About 100 people choke to death on maggie each year.
I better start watching what I say!!

4. The eye of an ostrich is bigger than maggie.
That must be some ostrich!

5. Maggie was named after Maggie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's 'It's a Wonderful Life'.
Some people's opinion: Its collectivism starts to look like right-wing populism. It's final message is that there's no place like home. There is no need for elsewhere; a patriot will find everything he needs in home, family and small-town American life.
Uhh, yeah...okay!

6. The condom - originally made from maggie - was invented in the early 1500s!
Even then I was promoting safe sex but do you think those royals listened to me?

7. Snow White's coffin was made of maggie!
Spo, you did mention that I sounded like Snow White and the seven ...........
Now you know why!

8. Forty percent of the world's almonds and twenty percent of the world's peanuts are used in the manufacture of maggie.
That's toooo easy!! Now I know why I'm nuts.

9. Maggie can be very poisonous if injected intravenously!
But quite harmless if taken in small doses.

10. A thimbleful of maggie would weigh over 100 million tons.
Wow!!!!!I never knew I was that powerful!!!

Thanks TY, it was great fun.

Where's Waldo?

After such serious posts, I thought it would be fun to lighten up my blog.

This is an actual picture taken for a newspaper ad, regarding a table for sale.

It was obviously taken by the husband, see if you can tell why. Click on the image to enlarge it if you feel it necessary.


















Another lighter upper!!!! :)

A woman calls her boss one morning and tells him that she is staying home because she is not feeling well.

"What's the matter?" he asks.

"I have a case of anal glaucoma," she says in a weak voice.

"What the hell is anal glaucoma?"

"Well", she says, it's a case where .......................

"I can't see my ass coming into work today."


And on that note.......Have A Great Day!!!!

The Mind Is A Terrible Thing To Waste

Because to waste a mind, is to waste a person.

I woke up this morning and for the first time in ???? many years, I felt good!!!
Like I was interested in what I was going to do that day. Not only interested but looking forward to it! I can't tell or explain to you what that felt like.

All I can say is that, I felt like I was my old self again. I'm not naive, I know this may not last but I am sure as hell hoping that it does.

The issues of medication that I spoke with my Doctor about were:

1) She increased my regular med because she told me that my body had become too familiar with my present dosage.

2) With the new dosage, I was more irritable and aggitated. I also take an anti-anxiety med(she did not increase) and it was not working.

3) She spoke of another drug I might have to take, in combination with the one I am taking. I was opposed to this, as I am very worried about *cocktails*. I have to work and with my job, I want to be in complete control of myself. The med I am now taking is called a *free drug*, no side affects.

All that being said, it has been almost three weeks now on the new dosage, and today I woke up and felt for the first time, it might be working!! YEAH!!!

It's weird, you live in this blah world for so long, it's all you expect it will ever be. You really forget what real living and feelings are all about. I don't want to lose this new (even if it's only a peek) look on life.

Wish me luck!!!

PS If the medication is working, now I can continue on to the therapy. They go hand in hand, you can't have one without the other to get well.


On Another Note

This picture is for Heather, just so you would know what I was talking about. I found out about them by coincidence, as my neice loves pretzels and she loves cheese, I bought them for her.
Well............they are to die for, not literally of course but if you are looking for a treat, I would highly recommend them. Yum.....my!!!

The Blister Sisters

We are Family........... I got all my sisters with me!!

Our brothers call us the *sad blisters*, a spoof on Cinderella's *bad sisters*. There are four of us, three of them (brothers). We were all together this weekend, as our oldest sister was visiting from Newfoundland. It's so nice to come from a loving family where we enjoy each others company. That's kudo's to our mother and father who instilled in us, the values of being kind and good people.

My father died when I was only fourteen, he was 49. My younger brother and sister were ten and six, respectively. My two older sisters are more than a decade older than me and even that much more than the youngest ones. They were already out of the house and doing their thing when Daddy died.

Mom went into a depression at that time because not only did her husband die but her father and mother died during that same year. Depression can potentially be a genetic gene passed on apparently, her father had it also. If this is the case, the only one to inherit this wonderful gene in our family was lucky moi.

Note: The exact causes of depression are not known. Both genetic and environmental factors may play a role.

The gene -- called 5-HTT (the serotonin transporter gene) -- may be one of several genes that affect susceptibility to depression. Serotonin, a brain chemical messenger, has been implicated in depression. When levels get too low, you get depressed.

My two older sisters and I went out shopping and to lunch today, it was wonderful. They are both like mother hens, god love them. I was fine but apprehensive during the day because I had a doctor's appointment at 4:00 p.m. I was not looking forward to it, it was my second appointment with my lady psychiatrist.

My first appointment with her two weeks ago was three hours long. I talked about things that I have never discussed with anyone, I felt physically drained when I left her office. Later in the week to follow, I had disturbing dreams about people that I haven't thought about in years.

I really wasn't up for that today. Turns out we really just talked about medication because I had some issues with it. I also mentioned to her about my dreams and she said, oh, didn't I tell you that would probably occur. No, I said.

She then explained, that talking about things that I have surpressed, would have that effect on me. I really like her, she's mid fifties, Indian descent, from England and very smart. She's also warm and kind, I can give her a hug when I leave. I'm also very lucky to have her, she doesn't take any new patients' and took me on as a favor to my GP. Hence my saturday appointment.

I have been floundering along on my own for the past three years with medication and no one to guide me, such as it is in this city because it's so hard to get an appointment with a specialist.

As apprehensive as I may be, I am so very excited that this woman may be able to help me to be happy again.

She even gives homework but I haven't reached that stage yet.


PS I didn't intend to get into all this when I started writing today, it just worked itself in.
Sneaky son of a bee's wax! :)

COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO

I'm 'bout as lazy as a hound dog right now, so I'ma gonna talk about the henhouse. (As Spo poetically put it).

Well, I work next door to a henhouse and their feathers would be a flyin' later on in the day.
Seems this mornin' the second in command over there, decided she could saunter over to our office, pick up some personal papers of my boss (in his office, on his desk) and photocopy them.
His assistant happened to arrive early and caught her in the act.

The assistant never got the chance to tell him until after lunch, as it was so busy. My boss is so easy going, it takes something really bad to get him goin'. I was there of course, "stirring up the pot", telling him he is so easy going that they take advantage of him. Which is so true!! They think he is a pushover and won't say anything about anything.

WELL........ there's a rooster in the henhouse now, and he told them what's what! He went next door and told them hens NEVER to go into his office again. He told them some other things too that they were doing had to stop. Was I proud of him? Hell Ya!!!

He would never have done that before I met him!!

So as my title says...........

Why I Have A Blog?

I'm doing this because Heather, over at Fly With Me, had the guts to do it!! If you think about it, we say some really personal things on our blogs. Some things I would never say to anyone but a close personal friend.

First of all, I don't have any close friends here with whom I can confide in. I haven't made any. Not that I haven't been asked to partake in outings or parties, quite the contrary. But I don't feel comfortable to do so yet. After three and a half years you would think so, but.......there's something holding me back. That doesn't mean that I'm not lonely. Soooooo, one evening I was online and I happened upon a blog. He was gay but a bit grumpy. (but very interesting) Thru him I found another blog, he was gay and very funny. Thru him I found another blogger, gay, funny, interesting and the rest is history. I got my own blog!!

The great thing for me was that these men were gay and fantastic people, that I would love to have as friends. You see, I have never been on a chat line because to me, that is people looking for more than just friends. Men will be men, my dears. No matter what anyone says, if you chat online or go to straight men's blogs, they will inevitably want .........more that just chatting. I don't know this for a fact, I'm just speaking from my experience with straight men in general.

As a result, I have found the most gracious hospitality of people, that I am proud to call my friends.
Including a wonderful female that I would never have known if not for blogging.
They are there when I feel like ranting or when I am just talking about something that delighted me in my daily routine.

I thank you all for keeping me entertained with all your daily events, educating posts, personal experiences, and making my life richer than it is.

Hugs and Kisses To You All!!!!!!!