Friday, June 15, 2007

The Mechanical Contrivium

Borrowed from Tiger By the Tale

1. The book of Esther in the Bible is the only book which does not mention maggie.
She always was the jealous type!

2. Only one child in twenty will be born on the day predicted by maggie.
Those odds aren't THAT bad!!

3. About 100 people choke to death on maggie each year.
I better start watching what I say!!

4. The eye of an ostrich is bigger than maggie.
That must be some ostrich!

5. Maggie was named after Maggie the taxi driver in Frank Capra's 'It's a Wonderful Life'.
Some people's opinion: Its collectivism starts to look like right-wing populism. It's final message is that there's no place like home. There is no need for elsewhere; a patriot will find everything he needs in home, family and small-town American life.
Uhh, yeah...okay!

6. The condom - originally made from maggie - was invented in the early 1500s!
Even then I was promoting safe sex but do you think those royals listened to me?

7. Snow White's coffin was made of maggie!
Spo, you did mention that I sounded like Snow White and the seven ...........
Now you know why!

8. Forty percent of the world's almonds and twenty percent of the world's peanuts are used in the manufacture of maggie.
That's toooo easy!! Now I know why I'm nuts.

9. Maggie can be very poisonous if injected intravenously!
But quite harmless if taken in small doses.

10. A thimbleful of maggie would weigh over 100 million tons.
Wow!!!!!I never knew I was that powerful!!!

Thanks TY, it was great fun.

5 comments:

Lemuel said...

These are a hoot! The crazy things about them that I found was that some of them actually "fit".

Did I ever tell you how much I like nuts? (the food! the food!) I've never choked on them and, although I have never injected them, I do have them in more than small doses - without ill effect. :)

maggie said...

Hi Lemuel, I'm sooo glad that you like nuts!! And small doses of them can be quite enjoyable.
If you risk them in more than small doses without ill effects, more power to ya!!
And to me. :)

Ur-spo said...

#3 is disturbing. You may want to think about changing your soap and perfume.

TigerYogi said...

Hilarious! :)

maggie said...

Hi Spo,I think you are right. :)

Hi TY, Thanks to you, yeah!! :)